


Stealth

by DRHPaints



Category: Barry (TV 2018), Bill Hader - Fandom
Genre: Acting, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff, Homophobic Language, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Other, Pining, Rimming, Smut, Strap-Ons, Suicidal Thoughts, Trans Male Character, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:42:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27613646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DRHPaints/pseuds/DRHPaints
Summary: After Cousineau assigns romantic scenes to the class, Barry finds out his acting partner Emmett has a crush on him and they start a relationship.
Relationships: Barry Berkman/Original Transmasculine Character
Comments: 5
Kudos: 17





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for phantomofthegallifreyanopera <3
> 
> Also, it's Trans Awareness Week, so if anyone else out there has requests for trans content, it will be given priority. Just let me know!
> 
> TW/CW: The original character of Emmett is assigned female at birth and in reference to his genitalia I use the words 'pussy,' and 'clit.' I apologize if these are too dysphoria-inducing for some, and if you would like a fic with different terminology, please don't hesitate to make a request!

Upon joining the class, Barry couldn’t understand, with his deft performances and delicate, handsome features, why Emmett wasn’t booking work. Perhaps tied with Sally as the most adept actor among them, Emmett would go on audition after audition, and no matter what it was for, a leading role in a sitcom or Bystander #3, he came back empty handed. Barry was boggled. Even Jermaine managed to pull the occasional walk on part, and though Barry admired him as a friend and appreciated him as a roommate, even he could tell his skills on the stage were atrocious.

It wasn’t until Barry expressed his confusion over a beer one evening to Sally at Residuals that she leaned in and explained the dilemma to him in a low voice. Emmett used to land jobs. Frequently. Even made it onto a major movie as the romantic lead’s best friend once. But that was years ago when his name wasn’t Emmett.

Somehow Barry never noticed his small hands, the soft curve of his body. The knowledge that Emmett went before casting directors, lines memorized and talent unchanged, only to be turned away because of his gender, made Barry’s knuckles whiten around his glass and the muscle in his sharp jaw flicker with fury.

One day after an especially strenuous class in which Gene asked the group to practice screaming at one another, an exercise Barry found more than a little daunting, Antonio’s supposedly wrathful face continually making him break out in nervous giggles, Barry approached Emmett.

“Hey Emmett, um…” Fingers tapping his thick thighs, Barry’s eyes darted. “Can I ask you something?”

“Oh, sure Barry.” Flashing a warm smile, Emmett tilted his head, sandy swoop of his hair tumbling. “What's up?”

“I just…” Barry swallowed, gesturing back toward the room. “I overheard you saying that audition you went on was a bust. Again, and, um…” Leaning in, Barry lowered his voice. “Sorry, if...if this is inappropriate to ask, but...but how...how do they know? When you go in? Because…” Barry’s cobalt eyes looked him up and down and Emmett felt his face warm. “No offense. I don’t know if that’s offensive, I guess. But...I wouldn’t be able to tell.”

“Oh.” Chuckling, Emmett nodded. “Well, on my resume my gender is listed as ‘Transmale’ so, as long as they take the time to read it.” Emmett shrugged, holding up his palms in defeat.

Barry nodded slowly, putting his hands in his pockets. “Oh...well, have you thought about…” Sliding his gaze away, Barry’s nose flared. “Maybe...taking that off of there?”

Half smile on his face, Emmett bobbed his head. “Yeah. I know I pass most of the time. I could go full stealth, if I wanted to.”

“Stealth?” Barry’s dark eyebrows knit together in confusion.

“Oh.” Emmett chuckled. “Right, that means something pretty different to you I guess, huh?” Playfully smacking Barry’s chest reminded Emmett of his strength and he swallowed. “It means that I would try to pass myself off as cis. Hide the fact that I’m trans. But, you know, Barry…” Dismissing the idea, Emmett sighed. “I spent over 30 years pretending to be someone I wasn’t. If honesty means I have to keep slinging hamburgers at the restaurant for the sake of being who I really want to be…” Emmett glanced down at himself with a slight frown. “Well, mostly…” He muttered under his breath. Barry narrowed his eyes curiously, but figured asking him to clarify might be rude. “Then I think it’s worth it.”

“Good for you, man.” Barry beamed. “I really admire that.”

“Aw, thanks, Barry.” With a nod, they walked out to the parking lot, splitting to their respective cars, Barry lifting his large hand in a wave before driving home.

Next week, Gene paired the class off, handing out short scenes from romantic dramas. “Alright.” Clapping his hands together, the short man smiled as he stood before them. “This week may get a little uncomfortable, but it’s something every actor has to face…” Gene made quotation marks in the air. “‘Love scenes.’ Okay, so, I’ve split you up, and I want you to work with your partner on memorizing, blocking, really getting into--”

“Excuse me, Mr. Cousineau?” Emmett raised a tentative hand in the air.

Smiling, Gene pointed. “Yes, Emmett?”

“Um, if it’s not too much trouble…” Looking down at his scene from _The Notebook_ which he was meant to do with Kirby, Emmett frowned. “Could I...if it’s alright, I’d like to do something, well…” A smirk blossomed on his face and he shrugged. “Gay. Instead. If that’s cool. No offense, Kirby” Turning around, Kirby waved him away with a smile.

Gene grinned. “Of course. Hmm…” Tapping his chin, Gene studied the floor for a moment. “Unfortunately there aren’t many scenes that I think the whole class is going to be familiar with in mainstream films. Are you alright with _Brokeback Mountain_?”

“Sure.” Emmett smiled, nodding.

“Great.” 

Taking the script back from Emmett, Gene glanced around the room. “Would anyone like to change partners to be with Emmett?”

After a beat of silence in which no one volunteered, Barry held a large hand aloft. “I will.” Barry knew that if he didn’t come forward, Nick would more than likely get drafted, as he got tapped to do any and every queer role in the class, and thought it would be nice to give him a change of pace for once. 

“Good, so Natalie?” Gene pointed at her and Kirby. “I’ll pick a scene from a lesbian romance for the two of you if you’re alright with that.” They both nodded and Gene continued. “Alright, if you want to break off, take some time to see how the words speak to you, we’ll regroup in thirty and do a dry run, okay?”

Walking up to Emmett, Gene let him know he would go print out the scene before scurrying back to his office. Barry approached, hands in his pockets and wide mouth smiling. Emmett found Barry’s choice to volunteer sweet, though not altogether surprising. 

One time, walking ahead of Emmett into class, Barry paused to hold the door open for him. Emmett took a step forward before, realizing his perceived faux paus, Barry panicked. “Oh....I’m sorry, I, um…” Barry hurriedly shut the door and they both stood in front of it awkwardly. “Go ahead.”

It was excruciatingly adorable. In truth, Emmett could care less if a man held the door open for him, but as he grabbed the handle and Barry thanked him, bobbing his head as he went through, the small kindness was endearing. But that was Barry all over, painfully nice to a fault.

And hot. Fuck, Barry was handsome to the point of cruelty. The first time he wore a henley to class, Emmett seriously considered pretending to be ill and going home. Emmett took the stage, palms sweating and lines butchered, and Gene asked him if anything was wrong. _No, Mr. Cousineau, but could you tell Barry to put his shoulders away so I can fucking concentrate? Okay, thank you._

Gene handed them fresh scripts, Barry and Emmett choosing an unoccupied bit of wall and hunkering down to peruse them. “Um…” Barry gnawed on his lip, peeking at Emmett over the top of the page. “I...well, I haven’t ever kissed anyone. On stage, I mean,” Barry giggled, shaking his head. “Obviously I’ve kissed people before.”

“Obviously.” Emmett smiled, narrowing his eyes at Barry’s use of the word ‘people.’ As far as he knew, Barry was straight. Though pretty sure Barry was single now, he and Sally dated for the majority of the previous year, and though Emmett sometimes got a queer vibe from him, he chalked a large part of that up to his deferential nature.

“Have you?” Barry raised an expressive eyebrow, tilting his head. “Kissed anyone on stage before?”

Nodding, Emmett tucked back his dirty blond hair. “Yeah, a few times.”

“So…” Leaning in conspiratorially, Barry glanced around and lowered his voice, as if they were two boys at a sleepover sharing a dirty joke. “How do you do it? Is there something I should know?”

“Well....” Emmett sighed. “There are basically two schools of thought. One…” He flicked out a finger. “Fake it. Just hold your lips against each other, go through the motions, no tongue, you know…” Shrugging, Emmett continued. “And two, just kiss for real.”

“Huh…” Barry looked off to the side, blinking. “Well, I mean…” Stretching out his lower lip and exposing his teeth, Barry gave Emmett a cautious look. “Just...we should go for it, right? Like Cousineau says? Commit and everything?”

Emmett swallowed hard. “Yeah...yeah, that...sounds good.”

“Okay, cool.” Reviewing the lines, Barry’s prominent eyebrows knit together. “I saw this when it came out, but I don’t remember it very well.”

“Hmm, well…” Emmett flipped through the script. “Do you want to play Ennis and I’ll be Jack? Also, I think we should ditch the accents. Seems like that’s a bad idea.”

Barry affected a heavy, Texan drawl. “Aw, you mean you don’t wanna talk like this up there?”

Rolling back with laughter, Emmett clutched his chest. “Hey, that’s really good!”

“Thanks.” Shrugging his broad shoulders, Barry smiled. “One of the guys in my unit was from El Paso. We used to rag on him a lot.”

Emmet chuckled. “Yeah, I bet.” Scanning the dialogue, Emmett narrowed his eyes. “Alright, so...like Gene says, it’s all about the core emotion, right? So in this scene, Ennis and Jack are reuniting after a long time apart.”

“So love, then?” Barry tilted his head.

“Well…” Teetering a hand in the air, Emmett looked at the ceiling. “Yes. But I think we can find more layers in there. Like, for me, Jack, it’s a desperate longing, really.” Glancing up at Barry’s stunning sapphire eyes, that jawline that he would beg to slice his thighs, Emmett gritted his teeth. _Oh, what a stretch. Such a difficult performance. However will I summon this from my soul?_ Sighing, Emmett returned his attention to the script. “And there’s some of that for Ennis, as well, but also a great deal more shame. So, try to tap into something you’re ashamed of, I suppose.”

Mouth settling into a flat line, the paper crinkled under Barry’s sizable hands. Shame? A plethora of examples hammered his brain like hailstones, unrelenting and merciless, coating him in a fine dusting of acrid regret. “Alright…” Voice soft, Barry nodded.

They read through the lines once simply to get used to the sound before standing and doing a bit of perfunctory blocking. “Okay so…” Holding out his arms, Emmett bit his bottom lip. “We don’t have a staircase, obviously. But I’m thinking you come in stage right, I’ll come in left? And, well…” Emmett swallowed, not meeting Barry’s eye. “You’re supposed to just kind of...grab me. And um...well, we don’t want to use the back wall, so...so I guess push me up against the table, maybe…” Doubling his grip on his script, Emmett’s other hand formed a fist to avoid fidgeting.

Barry looked over his shoulder at the stage, nodding slowly as he tried to picture it. “Okay, so…” Taking a few steps away from Emmett, Barry reviewed his line. Despite it being three words, he wanted to be certain, particularly since they only had the one before launching into the kiss. “Jack fucking Twist!”

Barry approached with a smile, and when his strong hands fisted themselves in the collar of Emmett’s shirt, dragging him a few feet to the right, he was positive the expression of sheer terror on his face was not appropriate to his character. But he couldn’t help it. It wasn’t that he was afraid of Barry. It was that Emmett never imagined Barry would be so close...so big. So strong. And it threw him more than a little off kilter.

“Hey, um…” Allowing his arms to fall, Barry studied Emmett’s green eyes. “I…” Barry began fidgeting at his thighs, resentful of his insatiable fingers. “I’m nervous. About going up there.” After what seemed like endless failures before his classmates, part of the reason Barry was eager to partner with Emmett is he thought he could glean some of the effortlessness with which he took the stage. Though Barry snatched a few glittering moments from the ether, most of the time he thought his delivery vacant and his body stiff, and if he was truly going to break away from doing hits, he needed to improve. “So, could we, um…” Dark blue eyes bouncing, Barry bit the inside of his cheek. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, or anything. So say no, of course, if...yeah. But, um...could we…” Sharply inhaling. Barry looked to the ceiling. “Kiss? Before we go? Just....” Shaking his head, Barry puffed his cheeks and let out a long, slow breath. “I think if it’s the first time up there I’ll look really unnatural.”

Emmett’s lungs hitched, eyes going wide. “Oh, well, um…” Nodding carefully, he swallowed. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess that’s a good idea.”

“Okay.” Barry sighed with relief, grinning. “Want to run it again then? And this time I’ll...we’ll...yeah.”

“Yup.” Wishing his voice didn’t sound so high and irregular, Emmett returned to his starting place. 

After Barry delivered his line, taking hold of him, Emmett secretly hoped his lips would be crusty. Or that Barry might be a drooler. Or perhaps the type of guy who crammed his tongue into the back of your throat, oblivious to any and every signal to hold back.

 _Fuck._ Nope. As he met Barry’s pink lips, soft but persistent, Emmett’s mouth opened beneath him and Barry’s tongue inched past his teeth, both of his wide palms glued to Emmett’s cheeks, guiding his head to the side to deepen the kiss. After all his encounters with meek, soft spoken Barry, Emmett could only assume the man with his large hands clamped against his head, walking him backwards until Emmett felt his ass bump into the wall, effectively tapped into his character.

As directed, they parted for half a moment, Barry studying Emmett’s emerald eyes. His small hand came up to cup Barry’s stubbled cheek as he dipped back down, recapturing his mouth. Barry thought he noticed a slight tremble in Emmett, an audible sigh when their tongues intertwined again, and as Barry broke away, roughly petting his fingers through Emmett’s dishwater blond tresses, an unfamiliar tug lingered in the pit of his gut before they continued.

Grateful the next line belonged to Barry, Emmett’s face was a violent shade of pink as they proceeded and if it wouldn’t have made his blush worse, he would’ve thanked dear Barry for not pointing it out. 

They were almost through the end when Gene clapped his hands. “Alright everybody, circle up!” Emmett and Barry sat together, watching as their classmates enacted their scenes two by two. For the most part shaky, Barry wasn’t quite as self conscious when he and Emmett took the stage.

Natalie joined them to deliver Alma’s two lines, and this time, when Barry left Emmett’s lips, he lingered on his green eyes for a moment, unable to discern the expression decorating his soft features before finishing the scene.

“Okay…” Gene turned down the corners of his lips, holding a palm aloft. “A little stiff. Forced.” Waving a hand, he nodded. “You’ll work on it.”

Frowning, the shelf of Barry’s shoulders broke as he slumped back to his seat. Emmett followed, touching a hand to Barry’s arm. “Hey…” Voice low, he leaned in. “Barry, it’s okay. No one expected us to get it right the first time around. We’ll make it there. Don’t worry.”

“Thanks.” Barry gave a half grin, bobbing his head. “I just want to do a good job.”

Squeezing his forearm, Emmett sat back with a nod. “We will. I’m sure of it.”

They observed the rest of the performances before Gene excused them for the day, Barry tossing his backpack over his shoulder and turning back to Emmett. “Hey, so, um…” Tilting his head, Barry put his hand in his pocket. “Do you want to get together before class on Tuesday? Try and work on it a little?”

“Sure…” Emmett crossed his bag over his chest, trying to tell himself that, no, Barry was definitely not inviting him over to make out. “I’m off tomorrow night, if that works,”

Nodding, Barry smiled. “Sounds good.”

***

Barry brushed his teeth before checking the refrigerator, frowning when he discovered that Nick and Jermaine drank the last of the beer, Gatorade, and orange juice, leaving him with a measly half bottle of plum wine to offer Emmett, perched on the top shelf since Christmas, none of them quite remembering who left it behind.

Nick let out a whooping cry of victory as he defeated Jermaine in their video game and Barry timidly approached the couch. “Hey, um...could you guys keep it down, maybe?” Twisting his hands, Barry gave a disarming smile. “Emmett’s going to be here soon to work on our scene, so…”

“Oh yeah…” Nick smirked, not bothering to turn his head. “I’m sure he can’t wait to _work_ with you, Barry.” Chuckling, he mashed the controller, scoffed, throwing up his hands in exasperation when Jermaine took the win.

Barry blinked, tilting his head. “What do you mean?”

Next screen loading, Nick craned his neck back to look at him. “Well...I mean, Barry. He has a little crush on you.” Shrugging, Nick turned back to the TV. “No big deal. He’s a good guy. Nothing to worry about.”

“Oh.” Heat rising up his neck, Barry shifted his weight from side to side, watching for a moment as Nick and Jermaine's characters ran over the terrain. “So...what...what did he say?”

“Oh, Em?” Nick bit his lip, twisting the controller from side to side along with the movements of his avatar. “Just said he thought you were sexy, I think. Oh, and nice, of course.”

“Oh…” Crooked, goofy grin blossoming on Barry’s face, he was grateful Jermaine and Nick were occupied with the video game and couldn’t see the pink spots donning his sharp cheekbones as the buzzer rang.

Barry pressed the button. “Hello?”

“Hey, it’s Emmett.”

“Okay, come on up.” Unlocking the door, Barry stepped into the hallway and Emmett’s smiling face soon greeted him atop the stairs with a wave. Barry found it difficult to meet his eye as he neared, considering the fresh information.

“Hey.” Entering, Barry closed the door behind them. “So...unfortunately I don’t have much, but...do you want some water?”

“Sure.” Emmett nodded, toeing off his shoes. “Thank you.”

Retrieving two glasses, Barry filled them and passed one to Emmett. “Okay, should we...go to my room?” Emmett agreed, following him, unsurprised to find Barry’s room severely neat. 

“Alright, so, um…” Unearthing his script, Barry took a sip of water for wont of something to do with his hands. “If you...want to start over there.” 

Barry gestured toward the door and Emmett nodded. “Barry, um…” _Don’t look at the bed. Don’t look at the bed. Don’t look at the bed._ “Are we...are we just doing the lines, or…?”

“Well, um…” Fingers rattling at his thigh, Barry studied the wall. “We’re...we won’t get better if we don’t...don’t practice, right?”

For some reason Emmett was hyper aware of his own blinking. “Right...yeah. Sounds good.”

“Okay.” Barry closed his eyes for a moment, shaking the nerves from his hands. Taking a deep breath, he placed his script on his desk. “Jack fucking Twist!”

Rushing to one another, Barry captured Emmett’s face, freezing an inch before his lips, hypnotized by his viridescent gaze before he fused their mouths together.

Barry’s cheeks rough under his palms, he backed Emmett into the door with a mutual grunt. Tall form hovering over him, Barry licked into his mouth and Emmet’s fingers played with the dark tendrils at the nape of his neck, reveling in the pressure of Barry’s broad frame, the warmth of his body.

But when Barry didn’t pull away, Emmett opened his eyes, looking quizzically around his limited view of the room as Barry continued kissing him. _Alright...anytime now…_

Leaving Emmett’s cheek, Barry took hold of his waist, a soft moan escaping his throat as he combed his fingers through his sandy locks, Emmett parting from him with a gasp. “Oh shit, I…” Barry stepped back, shaking his head, eyes falling to the floor. “Sorry. I…” Hands balled at his sides, Barry’s nose flared and the muscle in his sharp jaw flashed. “I...should’ve asked you before I did that…” Voice hardly a whisper, Barry studied the carpet with a nod.

“Barry...what...I…” Mouth working open and closed in silence, Emmett furrowed his brow. “Why...why did you...?”

Shrugging his shoulders, Barry bit his lip. “Well, I, um...Nick said…” Sharply inhaling, Barry held his breath and spoke quickly. “Nick said before you got here that you liked me, so…” Exhaling, Barry looked straight up to the ceiling. “So...I guess...yeah. I still should’ve asked, though. I’m sorry.”

”So…” Emmett narrowed his eyes at him, mind not daring to accept the data it received. “You...want to kiss me? For...for real?”

Lips folded under, Barry gave a sheepish nod. “Yeah. If you want to.”

“Yeah…” Emmett looked at his feet. “I do.”

There was no running into each other’s arms. None of the tearing, breathless passion they were meant to portray on stage. Instead they both awkwardly sauntered up to one another, hands wringing and eyes cast aside, smiles mirrored as Barry and Emmett closed the gap.

“Hey…” Barry muttered softly, leaning over him, touching an apprehensive hand to Emmett’s waist.

Grin boundless, Emmett draped his arms over Barry’s vast shoulders, trying to land on his gaze, but springing away every time as though his dark blue eyes were a trampoline. “Hey.”

Barry rested their foreheads together, a high giggle squeaking out in his nerves as he encircled Emmett’s supple body. Tipping up his chin, Emmett neared Barry’s tall form.

Soft pink lips. Scratchy cheeks under fingers. Huge hands roaming, flowing as their tongues swirled together like rain falling into the ocean, relieved to find a substance so akin to itself among the storming elements.

Barry broke away, eyes thoroughly shut and thumb rubbing minuscule circles over Emmett’s cheek. “So, um…” Voice wavering, Barry swallowed in an attempt to steady himself, failing. “So, when...when actors have to...have to do more, you know...on...for a movie, or whatever. How…” Lids fluttering open, Emmett’s green pools of want stared back at him. “What do they do?”

“More?” Emmett’s eyebrow crept cautiously up his forehead.

Fingers tiptoeing down, Barry grazed Emmett’s ass as his rough chin scraped past, mouth warm as he brushed a kiss to the sensitive spot below Emmett’s ear. “Yeah…”

“Oh.” Emmett traced Barry’s sculpted jaw with his lips, fingers trickling through his dark hair. “Well, um...if...I haven’t done it, but, I guess if...If one of them has a, you know, they have to wear a…” Swallowing, Emmett couldn’t help but chuckle. “A cock sock. You know, so they’re not directly rubbing up against each other.”

“And what if…” Barry grabbed two handfuls of Emmett’s ass, bearing forward until his burgeoning erection knocked into Emmett’s navel and he gasped. “What if they don’t have one? Huh?” Nipping at Emmett’s earlobe, when he lifted a leg, Barry snatched at his thigh, hauling it over his waist as he kissed across Emmett’s neck.

“I guess…” Breath shallow and urgent, Emmett fought to get back to Barry’s lips, knee pulling him in as they wrestled upright. “I guess...they just…” Frustrated, Emmett grabbed the sides of Barry’s chiseled face, tugging his cobalt gaze forward. “Go raw.”

In the half second before Barry crashed into him, powerful arms effortlessly hoisting him into position on the mattress, large body a swarm as he latched onto his face, Emmett saw a flash of a Barry he only witnessed on a handful of previous occasions.

Dark blue eyes wide, left one twitching a little, nose flared, mouth a snarl. This was table-flipping Barry. This was the Barry whom Emmett ached for when Gene and Sally disrespected his boundary, Barry clearly stating he wasn’t comfortable choking her, but they heedlessly pushed, and though Emmett was thrown by the level of his reaction, he didn’t blame Barry for exploding. 

So to have that Barry, thrusting his massive denim-clad cock into him, fingers tearing at the collar of his shirt, moaning into his mouth while his tall frame undulated above him, was exhilarating.

For a moment Barry lost himself, awash in the sensations of a slippery tongue and traveling fingers of another person. Handing himself over, the concept that someone wanted him edged Barry into delirium.

In that brief respite, Barry’s brain allowed him to forget. Allowed him to forget that below their writhing bodies lay a cadre of killing tools hidden beneath the mattress. To forget that, were Emmett to find out, he would not be merely horrified, but would likely surrender Barry to the authorities. For a second, Barry forgot the blood staining his hands as Emmett rolled under his touch, voice intoning a sultry whisper, “ _Barry…_ ”

But then alarms echoed in Barry’s head and he shifted off to the side, cupping Emmett’s cheek. “Hey, Em, um…” Tongue darting over his lips, Barry blinked down at him. “I don’t want to do anything to make you uncomfortable, so...so just tell me what you like, okay?”

“Oh, right. Yeah, well…” Stroking Barry’s prominent cheekbone, Emmett smiled. “Barry, you can touch me anywhere you want. It’s cool. I’m comfortable with that. How about you? Anything I should know about or avoid?”

Barry glanced down at himself. “Nope, I don’t think so.”

“Great.” Emmett barely bit off the one syllable before he straddled Barry, delighted sigh escaping his throat when Barry took his ass in both of his big hands and thrust against him. Grinding over the stiff column of his erection, Emmett soaked through his boxers as their mouths laced together.

“Fuck…” Barry breathed, lips moving to Emmett’s collarbone as he undid the top button of his shirt. “I want you so badly.”

Nodding insistently, Emmett hardly suppressed the moan that bubbled up from his chest. “Me too.” Emmett threaded his fingers through Barry’s short, dark tresses, studying his face. “Do you want to get undressed?”

“Yeah.” They both stood, too eager to bother disrobing one another, instead ripping off their own clothes with such voracity it looked as though they were irritated by the existence of limbs. 

Thumbs in the waistband on his boxers, Emmett paused and stared down at Barry’s naked body as he climbed back in the bed. Sprinkling of dark hair on his built chest, endearing little belly, and massive cock curling upward in greeting, Barry looked down at himself, then up at Emmett’s wide eyed gaze. “What?” 

“Oh, nothing.” Emmett dropped his boxers before crawling on top of him. “You’re just so sexy, Barry.”

Giggling, Barry held his palms aloft in confusion, shaking his head as Emmett dipped down to kiss the mirth from his mouth. Reaching between their legs, Emmett spread the lips of his pussy, notching Barry’s thick cock between them before he ground himself over his length.

Barry drew up his knees, planting his heels in the mattress for better traction as he swirled his hips into Emmett, gliding through the dewy slit of his pussy. “Oh _fuck_....Em, you feel so good…”

Thumb passing over Barry’s nipple, Emmett noticed his face turned into him and Barry’s hips quickened. Experimenting, he plucked the other between his thumb and forefinger, rewarded when Barry let out a mewl of content, shoving his cock into Emmett with fresh urgency.

“Mmm...Barry…” Fingers trailing over his scalp, his crisp jaw, his firm chest, Emmett nibbled at the raised bud of Barry’s nipple until he whined with need, both massive hands smacking over Emmett’s ass and humping wildly.

“I...I…” Barry found it difficult to form sentences as he missed cramming himself inadvertently inside of Emmett by half an inch in his feverish ardor. “I want you so bad, Em. _Fuck_...I…” Shaking his head, Barry tapped Emmett’s shoulder and sat up. “Let me get a condom.”

“Oh, um…” Smirking, Emmett slid his eyes away. “We can use one if you want, but...I don’t have any plumbing anymore, so...and I don’t have any STI’s so, if you don’t either, then…” Emmett shrugged, sticking out his lower lip.

“Oh.” Barry’s arm fell. “Well that’s...nice.”

Emmett pawed his way to Barry’s face, tracing his lower lip with his thumb. “Yeah…” Wedging an arm between them, Emmett slowly positioned the wide head of Barry’s cock at his entrance, lips whispering at his joined ear. “I want to feel you cum inside me, Barry.”

Sinking down, Barry let out a strangled moan, strong arms closing around Emmett’s back for a moment as the tight heat encapsulated him. Holding one another and hardly moving, Barry and Emmett breathed, Emmett acclimating to the stretch as Barry’s hand snuck between them, thumb over his clit.

Grip around him loosening, Emmett claimed Barry’s lips, fisting into his dark tendrils as he began to bounce. Emmett sensed he was atop two different men at the same time. There was one Barry, pelvis vehemently pounding into him, huge hand digging into his hip with such ferocity he was sure to be purple, sore, and not a bit mad about it tomorrow. Then there was the Barry arching his neck, eyes squinched and sharp jaw dropped, expression resembling agony as tortured whimpers huffed between his pink lips, desperately peppered with, “ _Please...Please, don’t stop…”_

The first time Emmett cinched around him, knees pistoning and shrieks ricocheting off the walls as he clung to Barry’s broad chest, Barry curled his toes, slammed into him fervently, gritted his teeth while his jawline popped and Emmett shouted his name. The second time, Barry folded forward, sitting until they were face to face, bodies pulsing rapidly and panting into each other’s open mouths.

“Oh _fuck_ , Em, yes…” Barry nodded eagerly, sensitive cock glorying in what could be aftershocks or the throbs on an impending quake, he couldn’t tell as he barreled inside of Emmett’s tight pussy. “ _Fuck, you’re gonna make me cum so hard!”_

“ _Barry! Barry, yes! Fuck me! Just like that!_ ” Lips poised together, Emmett squeezed his thighs over Barry’s hips, seizing above him, nails clawing over his pale flesh as an unholy scream tore from his throat. “ _Barry_!”

“ _Fuck!”_ Constriction overwhelming, Barry ceased his fiddling between Emmett’s legs, hooking over his shoulders and hastily yanking him down onto his cock. “ _Fuck! Em! Yes! Fuck! I’m cumming! Yes! Emmett!”_ Bed squeaking in defiance, Barry whorled them together violently until he froze, breath held and face distorted. A wordless whine speaking years of self-denial broke from Barry as his body shuddered, hot cum blossoming inside of Emmett as he continued to pulsate around Barry’s tender cock.

Forehead at the hollow of Emmett’s throat, Barry gulped air as Emmett rested atop his head, rubbing circles into his wide back while Barry softened inside. Kissing along the curve of Barry’s ear, Emmett squeezed his sweaty, pallid flesh. “I’ve wanted this for a long time.”

Barry wasn’t sure what to say. Now that the fog of lust lifted, reality pieced itself back together around him. Didn’t he learn his lesson with Sally? Didn’t Barry see that he was a fungus, a cancer, a malignancy that overtook anything in its path, corrosive and contagious, dooming all which it encompassed to danger?

Lifting his chin and taking in Emmett’s smiling, beautiful face, Barry didn’t think he could put him through that. But at the same time, Emmett’s limbs enveloping him while his fingers teased through Barry’s sweat-blackened hair, he couldn’t let go, either.

With a sigh, Emmett dismounted, the two of them shuffling down, Emmett chuckling at the tiny, soft noises Barry made as he squirmed, attempting to get comfortable beneath the blanket before tugging Emmett into his arms.

Laying in companionable silence for a few minutes, Barry’s fingers trickled down to Emmett’s chest, etching over the line of his scar. “Was it...hard?”’

“What?” Emmett glanced down at himself. “The surgery?”

Barry lifted a vast shoulder. “I don’t know. All of it. Becoming yourself. Whatever you feel comfortable sharing, I guess.”

“Well…” Absentmindedly massaging Barry’s belly as he thought, Emmett blinked. “Less difficult than it is for some, more than it is for others, I guess. Got started later in life than most people. Was thirty by the time I took my first testosterone shot. So I had to unlearn all this stuff that’s been hammered into me, you know? About how to be a woman…” Emmett hitched a sad grin on his face. “Still can’t help automatically smiling at every man I see after years of ‘why don’t you smile more?’ and ‘you’d be so much prettier if you’d just smile,’ though when I do it now…” Chuckling, Emmett shook his head. “Sometimes I think I give guys the wrong impression.”

Barry giggled, kissing his forehead. “Yeah, that makes sense.” 

“But, yeah. Coming out was hard. I’m estranged from my family. They didn’t kick me out though, like a lot of people have to deal with. I left because I was sick of being just ‘tolerated.’ I think…” Nodding slowly, Emmett swallowed. “I don’t know. Maybe I expect too much, but I think someone deserves to be loved by their family. No matter what.”

Quiet, Barry closed the circle of his powerful arms, eyes shutting as he nestled into Emmett. “Yeah...everyone deserves that.”

As they drifted, Barry replayed Emmett’s words in his mind. Emmett’s difficulties unlearning a lifetime of unwanted habits reminded Barry of those drilled during his time in the Marines, the deadly reflexes that were now second nature, that Barry would give anything to delete from his consciousness.

And Barry thought about Emmett, picturing him a bit younger, features perhaps a bit softer, going to his family, his friends, only to be cast out, rejected for his true nature. Barry knew it wasn’t the same, knew Emmett had no choice in his personhood, whereas Barry’s life, despite feeling like an inescapable cage, was the compilation of hundreds, perhaps thousands of small paths taken over the years that led him to his current hateful destination.

But Barry couldn’t help find the comparison reassuring, reflecting on what it was like when he first came back to Cleveland. Barry tried. He truly did. Attending the welcome home party, joining those who were supposedly old friends for drinks, returning the myriad of phone calls. But it became apparent after the first week that the Barry before them now was not the Barry they once knew. 

This Barry slogged through life, body sporting shattered edges that sparked along the walls of existence, better to remain isolated lest he set the world ablaze. Hiding himself away, it was frightful how little time it took for people to stop calling, forget to drop by and check on him. At first Barry told himself people were busy. That it wasn’t personal. They’ll get around to him, eventually.

But soon the goblin of self-loathing, feeding on extended silence and sleepless nights, scuttled up his spine, taunting, cackling as it told Barry: _No one wanted you to come back. You should’ve died in the desert. At least then you would’ve been useful._

Barry remembered those interminable, gray days all too well. And as they relaxed in his bed, Barry saw the scars decorating Emmett’s skin, mostly white now, ghosts of pain past. Noticing the ones on his forearms before, Barry said nothing. He knew. Knew what it was to come to that place. That place where any inkling of sadness, even the numbness, evaporates, to be replaced with resolve. And as the sounds of the Los Angeles night floated in through his window, Emmett’s breathing deep and even beside him, Barry hoped neither of them would visit that hell ever again.


	2. 2

Emmett woke early, creeping backward out of bed in an effort not to disturb Barry and scooping his discarded boxers from the floor before he peeked out to go to the restroom. Returning, Barry slumbered on, dark hair twisting in all directions, eyes darting beneath the lids, big hands twitching from time to time as the occasional incoherent grumble passed by his parted pink lips.

Emmett slipped in beside Barry and he snorted, blinking awake. “Oh hey…” Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Barry stretched his tall form, legs shaking and yawning. Consciousness hazy, he licked his lips and took Emmett’s waist, scooting in close to him and pulling the blanket over his broad shoulder, refusing to acknowledge the morning as he mumbled. “How’d you sleep?”

“Great.” Smiling, Emmett caught Barry’s mouth, his morning erection bumping his hip. “How about you?” 

Barry nodded, eyes heavy as Emmett’s hand trickled southward. “Mmm...good. Yeah.” Fingers closing around his cock, Barry hummed in approval, Emmett rolling him onto his back and peppering kisses along his sharp jawline and down to his collarbone.

“I want to suck you, Barry.” Emmett whispered, steadily pumping. Muscles liquid and room far away, Barry nodded, touching his lips to Emmett’s cheek before he began his descent. Usually Barry snapped alert immediately, his military training leaving him with a strict morning routine. But as Emmett flicked a tongue over his nipples before the hot circle of his mouth absorbed Barry’s thick cock, he rid himself of the need to be productive, to be a tool for someone else’s purposes. 

Tongue whipping around the wide head, Emmett kneaded Barry’s thick thigh before ensconcing half of his considerable length in his throat, hollowing his cheeks and jerking Barry’s shaft to his lips. The sounds of Barry’s ecstasy were wickedly erotic, from minuscule lip-flubbing whimpers as his heels kicked over the sheets, to roiling, gutteral groans torn from his innards as he buried his lengthy fingers in Emmett’s sandy hair, eyelids fluttering as he tried to keep his hips flat on the mattress.

“Oh  _ fuck _ ...fuck, Em. Wait…” Barry tapped his shoulder urgently and he popped up, tilting his head at Barry curiously. “Come up here.”

Emmett looked down at Barry’s cock and frowned. “You don’t want me to anymore?”

“No, I mean…” Annoyed that he couldn’t clarify quickly enough to get back to the addictive warmth of Emmett’s mouth, Barry held up his hands and sighed. “Let me do you at the same time. Come on.”

“Oh...okay.” Eyebrows shooting up, Emmett grinned and flipped himself around, resting on his side with legs parted before taking Barry back into his throat.

Barry wasted no time, sending his crisp jaw forward as he opened the lips of Emmett’s pussy, discovering him slick with excitement and moaning at the delicious flavor as he greedily lapped at his clit. 

Face buried between his thighs, Emmett rutted into Barry’s chiseled features, finding it difficult to concentrate on his yearning cock as Barry subtly nudged him and a cry escaped his loose lips. 

Inserting two lengthy fingers inside, Barry curled until Emmett’s muscles leapt and he dropped Barry’s cock, falling onto his back with a gasp as Barry rapaciously sucked his clit. “ _ Oh Barry! Fuck! Fuck! Just like that! Yes! _ ” Hand scrunched in Barry’s dark hair, the other tried to keep moving over his cock, but grew uncoordinated as Emmett convulsed and dripped down his square chin. “ _ Barry! Barry, yes! Yes! Barry!” _

Relentless, Barry’s tongue continued its ministrations and Emmett gently pushed him away, shaking his head and repositioning himself before taking Barry down to the root. “ _ Oh fuck! _ ” Barry’s ass rose from the sheets, jamming himself into Emmett’s throat with a cry as Emmett fondled his balls before he settled. Thrashing under his handiwork, Barry panted, hands crawling over Emmett as he grew close, his hair, his shoulders, his arms, desperate to absorb his essence before he reached the end.

“ _ Em! Em, fuck! I’m gonna cum! Fuck! Em!” _ Releasing his hold, Barry strained as Emmett stayed down, muscles of his throat undulating until, body jumping and quivering, pulse after pulse of salty cum painted the back of Emmett’s throat.

Emmet kissed his way up Barry’s long body to find him puffing out his cheeks and rubbing his face. Scratching under his chin, Barry giggled, giving Emmett a quick peck before sitting up and combing back his hair. “Alright, you hungry?”

“Yeah.” Emmett nodded, retrieving his boxers and undershirt from the floor.

They padded out to the kitchen together, Nick returning a box of cereal to the top of the fridge before turning back to them with a knowing smirk. “You two look...well rehearsed.”

Barry rolled his eyes before turning to a quite blushy Emmett. “Toast? Banana? Cereal?”

“Banana, please.” 

Nodding, Barry grabbed one for himself and they silently chewed, Emmett’s green eyes smiling at him. “What?”

“I didn’t say anything.” Emmett grinned, taking another bite.

Barry pinched his hip. “Then why are you looking at me like that?”

It took every modicum if his self restraint not to do anything lascivious with his banana. “No reason.” Emmett shrugged, finishing his fruit and tossing the peel in the trash.

With their bedroom activities, less than two hours remained before the start of class and Emmett wanted to shower and change first. Taking Barry’s lips for a kiss that made him consider asking if they should play hookie and spend the day in bed, Emmett ruffled his hair and said goodbye with a smile.

Parking at the studio, Barry spotted Emmett getting out of his car and jogged up to him. “Hey…” Arms stiff and hands dancing, Barry shifted his weight from foot to foot before deciding not to restrain the impulse that made him rush over in the first place. Swooping in, he caught Emmett’s lips with a mutual giggle, lightly pressing him against the car door as Emmett’s hands wound into his dark hair.

“Oh!” A voice piped up behind them and Barry spun around to see Sally blinking in confusion. “Are you two...rehearsing? Out here?”

“Oh, um…” Barry’s sapphire eyes slid away, mouth open as he carefully took Emmett’s hand. “...Nope.”

“Oh….that’s nice.” Sally nodded. But her smile was a hair too tight, her eyes a touch too wide. “Alright. I’ll see you guys inside.” Pointing over her shoulder, Sally walked into the studio and Emmett tried to be kind and avoided chuckling.

“Okay.” Barry extracted his script to give it a last once over as he and Emmett took their seats. “You ready?”

Nodding, Emmett paged through his own. “Yeah, I think so. You?”

Barry bobbed his head. Reflecting on what Emmett said about his character motivation, longing and shame, the first image that popped into Barry’s mind was Chris, the car, the gun, and his brain quickly scuttled away. 

No. Too much shame. 

Then Barry remembered an incident he hadn’t thought about in years. It was Barry’s first tour, late one night after some of the guys snuck a few bottles of liquor into the tents. Everyone else either flitted away or passed out, Barry giggled in a canvas chair beside Vic, silly and slurring. During their time together they became close friends, bonding over a shared history in the midwest and joking in between drills. 

Laughter fading, Vic clinked their bottles of schnapps together, snagging Barry’s shoulder and pulling him in until their foreheads met. “You’re fuckin’ awesome, Barry. You know that?”

“No, you are, man.” Barry giggled, taking Vic’s lapel. “So fuckin’ cool.”

Sloppy lips. Peach flavored tongues. Until Vic shoved him back with a rage that nearly sent Barry toppling to the floor. “What the fuck, dude?”

Palms upheld. Barry shook his head. “Sorry, man, I--”

“I’m not a fuckin’ faggot, Berkman.” Standing, Vic weaved his way out of the tent, leaving Barry shaken. Thankfully he never reported him. Barry suspected because Vic, at some point, faced the reality that he kissed him back. But still, the memory caused Barry’s ears to redden and his stomach to clench.

“Barry? Emmett?” Gene looked back at them and they took the stage, Natalie waiting off to the side to deliver her lines as Alma.

At first as Emmett flicked the nerves from his hands, getting into place, he thought he would have difficulty summoning the yearning necessary for Barry now that his long-held desire was sated-twice-since their last time beneath the lights. But, Barry’s face blossoming into a warm smile, tossing him a quick wink before launching into character, Emmett had no trouble at all.

“Jack fucking Twist!” Barry exclaimed, throwing up his hands before they met in the middle. Looking around cautiously, he dragged Emmett toward the table, mouths meeting. Barry didn’t hear the whispers. Emmett didn’t register Nick laughing. It wasn’t until Gene clapped a second time that they separated, blinking and blushing.

“Barry, I believe you have a line to deliver?” Gene looked between them incredulously and Barry gave a shy smile.

“Sorry…”

Waving a dismissive hand, Gene pointed to stage right. “No problem. From the top.” 

During their next pass Barry and Emmett contained themselves, garnering a round of applause from their classmates and high praise from Gene. Watching the rest of the performances, most everyone at least improved since the last session and afterward Barry strolled with Emmett out to his car.

“Hey, so…” Emmett hung his hands on the front of Barry’s blue button up. “It’s my day off. Do you want to hang out?”

“Sure.” Taking Emmett’s waist, Barry smiled. “Did you want to come back to my place?”

“Um…” Peering over Barry’s shoulder at Nick and Jermaine, Emmett made a face. “I think my roommate is actually over at her boyfriend’s, if you’d rather follow me back to my apartment?”

Nodding, Barry gave him a squeeze. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

On the drive, Barry found himself once again pondering the parallels between himself and Emmett. He wondered if, before his transition, Emmett had that feeling. That feeling Barry woke up with everyday. Like he stepped outside at the height of winter, mucus membranes in his nose freezing, gasping, only to crystallize his lungs, skin aflame with the frigid cold, warring with himself as to whether or not he should go back inside, when he knew he needed to complete the task that made him brave the elements in the first place.

Of course Barry knew he damned himself to this double life, but that didn’t abolish his thrumming heartbeat, his hands, irrepressibly moving, tapping, shaking. Recognizing his part in his demise didn’t make Barry feel any better, it only convinced him that he deserved whatever fate might befall him in the future.

But as he rolled to a stop before Emmett’s building, Barry told himself he was going to have one day. One day free of Fuches, the weapons, the Chechens. One day in which he turned off his phone, perhaps even his brain, and pretended he was someone who could have a normal, happy life.

Toeing off his sneakers, Barry glanced around Emmett’s apartment, nodding appraisingly. “Nice place.”

“Thank you. Are you thirsty? Water? Juice?”

Barry took a step further toward the living room. “No, I’m okay. Thank you.”

Arms encircling him from behind, Emmett pulled down the back of Barry’s shirt, kissing the nape of his neck with a chuckle. “Mmm…” Hand sneaking around to undo the button of Barry’s pants, he giggled and reached back to play with Emmett’s hair.

“What’re you doing?”

“Oh just  _ since my roommate is gone!”  _ Emmett yelled into the depths of the apartment, waiting a beat for a reaction that didn’t come and nodding in approval. “All I can think about is how badly I want to make you fucking  _ scream _ , Barry.” Getting on his toes, Emmett delicately nibbled at Barry’s earlobe and he shivered, teeth clenched and eyes falling shut.

“Oh yeah? That’s…” Cock unfurling as Emmett’s fingers breached his boxers, Barry nudded exuberantly. “That...that sounds good.”

Emmett kneaded one of Barry’s little asscheeks. “Hey Barry…” Voice an alluring whisper against his ear, Emmett pushed Barry forward one step, and then another. “Do you like to get fucked?”

Knees buckling, Barry’s sharp jawline popped and he leaned his large frame back against Emmett as they proceeded to his bedroom. “Yeah...yeah, I do.” Emmett claimed Barry’s stiffening cock, undoing the buttons of his shirt as he gave him a generous tug. Barry hopelessly tried curling his arms behind himself to grasp any part of Emmett he could reach, sighing his dismay as Emmett shucked off his shirt, kissing over Barry’s mountainous shoulders before crouching down to rid him of his pants and boxers. 

Emmett took Barry's ass in both hands, lifting and separating as he dragged his teeth over the sensitive skin of his neck. “You want me to use my tongue first, Barry? Hmm?”

“Oh fuck…” Barry’s big hand closed around Emmett’s wrist and he nodded urgently in front of him. “Yes. Please. Fuck.”

Chuckling, Emmett placed a hand on Barry’s upper back, positioning him over the mattress. Barry immediately bent his knees, but Emmett took him by the hips, hauling Barry’s ass into the air before cracking a palm across the cheek, reveling in Barry’s chirp of delight.

Emmett spread Barry open, tongue flicking tentatively. The circle of muscle reflexively tightened before Emmett painted another swath over its surface and Barry began to relax into the sensations. Lapping ravenously, Emmett hooked around and steadily milked Barry’s turgid cock. 

“ _ Oh fuck...fuck, Em, that’s so good!” _ Face in the mattress, Barry fisted into the sheets as Emmett pointed his tongue and swirled inside of him, the slippery warmth intoxicating as Barry found himself rocking back into his eager face.

“ _ Oh Em! Yes! Fuck! Please! Fuck!” _ Turning his forehead into the bed, Barry ground himself into Emmett’s mouth, wheezing with desire as his tongue twisted inside of his hole. “Em...just...just…” Shaking his head, Barry pounded a fist into the mattress. “ _ Just fuck me!” _

Emmett extricated himself with a grin, giving Barry’s ass an adoring pat. “You got it.”

The wait for Emmett to undress, retrieve the strap on, don it, and return to him with the lube was interminable and Barry threw a veritable tantrum in an effort not to touch himself, wriggling and shuffling his feet over the carpet with snarls of discontent.

Lubing himself, Emmett smeared the sticky liquid over Barry’s entrance, slipping a finger inside. “Is this what you want, Barry?” Emmett swept his cavernous depths until he reached Barry’s prostate, his muscular legs flexing. “Hmm?”

“ _ Yes! Fuck!”  _ Barry drove himself back, arching his neck. “ _ More!” _

Inserting a second finger, Emmett massaged inside of him, juicing the head of Barry’s cock with his free hand. “Like that? Hmm? Does that feel good?”

Body at war, Barry’s pelvis couldn’t decide whether to force itself back onto Emmett’s fiddling fingers or forward into the warm circle of his hand, causing him to worm around ineffectually, crying out in frustration. “ _ Fuck! Em, please! Please! Just fuck me!” _

Retracting his arm, Emmett rubbed circles into the small of Barry’s back as he positioned the head at his entrance. “Mmm...I have dreamt about fucking you, Barry.” Emmett surged forward, relishing the way Barry’s spine curved as his body swallowed inch after inch, breathy gasp puffing from his built chest.

“ _ Oh fuck, yes _ …” Swallowing, Barry closed his eyes, hands above his head as he began slamming himself back onto Emmett. Pulling Barry’s begging cock, Emmett barreled inside of him, tipping forward until Barry’s face smashed into the mattress, panting a warm wet spot into the sheets.

“ _ Yes! Fuck me! Harder! Don’t stop! _ ” Barry cried, voice cracking and shapely legs quaking. Doubling his efforts, Emmett feverishly clapped against Barry’s ass, but he hit the bed with a throat-ripping shout. “ _ HARDER!” _

Emmett curled over him, hand on Barry’s scalp as his chest heaved and he hammered inside of him. “You want to get on top? Huh, Barry? Fuck yourself on this cock? Huh? Is that what you want?”

Nodding as much as he was able in his restricted position, Barry’s squished lips pleaded. “ _ Yes! Fuck! Let me, please!” _

Extricating himself, Emmett laid down on his back. Barry stood, legs jelly beneath him before straddling Emmett on the bed, hastily wiping sweat and drool from his face before positioning himself and dropping with one fell swoop.

“ _ Oh fuck!” _ Knocking a groan out of himself, Barry began a frenzied bounce, eyes rolling and left one twitching as Emmett seized his cock, yanking ardently while his other hand slipped between himself and the harness to spread the lips of his pussy. Each of Barry’s downstrokes caused the interior ridges to skip over his swollen clit and Emmett rolled his hips as Barry ruthlessly rode him.

Big feet near Emmett’s rib cage and palms frantically shoving into the mattress, Barry arched back into the space between Emmett’s legs, dribbling himself rapidly and whimpering as though he were being beaten. “ _ Em! Fuck! Fuck! I’m gonna cum! Fuck! Em!”  _ Head ticking violently to the side and eyes white, Barry’s crisp jaw dangled as he closed around Emmett, thick thighs shivering. 

Distant silence, white and empty, drowned Barry, and for a single second he was gone. Gone from all the responsibilities, the hurt, the memories that clung to his wan flesh and anchored him to his life, an ocean of sorrow, murky and dense, Barry never able to swim to shore.

One high, vulnerable note peaked from Barry as cum splattered over his belly, dotting his dark chest hair. Knees weaving in and out, Barry shook uncontrollably as Emmett trembled beneath him, Barry’s name on his lips as he removed shining fingers from between his thighs and they both sought oxygen.

Barry lifted off gingerly before flopping to his side, breathing heavily and combing back his damp locks. Loosening the straps, Emmett shed the harness, shuffling in next to Barry’s sweaty body, playing through his chest hair, spots of cum drying among its dark patches as they lay in recumbency.

“Mmm...that was great.” Emmett touched a kiss to his rough cheek, polishing Barry’s sharp cheekbone with his thumb.

Barry flipped onto his side to face Emmett. “Yeah.” Though Barry knew complication awaited them, that Emmett couldn’t fix him, and perhaps Barry wouldn’t even be able to protect him, in that moment, in that bed, Barry’s heart swelled with the promise of joy. “It was.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read! If you enjoyed this story, please leave a comment or come say hi on tumblr at fandomtransmandom. I also take requests!


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